In The News
BUSH WANTS TO APPOINT HIS MUM TO SUPREME COURT
After being utterly humiliated by his own party trying to force through close friend, sycophant, personal lawyer and White House counsel (read: crony), Harriet Miers into the Supreme Court (pictured with here George Bush pointing her to the highest ledge on his ranch from which she can jump), he wants to take the extreme action of nominating his own mother.
After his first choice, Mrs Miers, was seen off by the neo-cons because she has no track record of voting in an extremely right-wing manner, i.e. abortions/gays/poor people = bad and Jesus/straights/rich people = good, she was forced to withdraw and take her own life by leaping from a malformed hillock on Bush’s ranch onto a specially prepared spike shaped like Christ Almighty. This was in spite of, or maybe because of, an endless raft of personal endorsements from the monkey stooge of the neo-conservative movement. Not for the first time, words from President Bush’s mouth have cost people their lives.
In a desperate scrabble to regain some kind of credibility within his own party of backward reactionaries, Lunch Break can exclusively reveal that baby Bush wants his 80 year old mummy to sit on the Supreme Court and do his bidding. Bush hopes that the ex-first ladies popularity within the Republican Party will patch up the impending lame duck administration that he is nominally in charge of.
Barbara Bush was unavailable for comment on her softheaded son’s harebrained scheme, so we used an old quote of hers when Gulf War v2.0 started: "Why should we hear about body bags and deaths? Oh, I mean, it's not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?"
